Crossing a Dangerous Road? Take His Hand!

Hi Friends,

A new interview on my infertility journey was posted today. For some encouragement, check it out here:
http://www.amateurnester.com/2014/06/on-the-journey-with-marlo.html

Also, our friend, Doug Huckins, will be having quadruple bypass open heart surgery this coming

Tuesday, so please be praying for him and his family!  His upcoming surgery reminded me once again of the dangers of walking in this world and how we need to be holding the hand of the Father through it all.  So, along those lines, here is a poem to ponder:

TAKE MY HAND

"Take my hand, child,"

The father says, his hand extended,

As they step from the curb

To face the dangers of the untamed street.

"Take my hand," he says,

Because a child must not walk alone.

So the father takes hold of the child's hand,

And the child knows he is loved.

"Take my hand, child,"

The Father says, His hand extended,

As I step from the curb of my safe life

To face the dangers of my untamed world.

"Take my hand," He says,

Because a child of God must not walk alone.

So the Father takes hold of my hand,

And I know I am loved.

Need Refreshment? Waters of Grace are Available!

Hi Friends!

Well, we're three whole days into our summer routine, and the kids are having a great time and I'm … hanging in there and making adjustments to said summer routine! :-)  Here's what we're doing:

--Getting up, getting ready, taking care of critters
--Reading together one chapter of John
--Reading together one chapter of Hinds Feet on High Places (my favorite!)
--Doing a fun God-centered activity
--Practicing instruments
--Doing Projects (my next project for them is getting them to clean up the big ol' mess upstairs!)
--Lunch!
--Outdoor time in the afternoon (including horses, volleyball, biking, running around the lawn, swimming, hiking, whatever)

Today, for our fun God-centered activity, we played charades, of something that reminds of us God.  Some did the wind, or a bird, or a growing plant.  I did water.  I did it because you can't live very long without water.  It brings life and growth and hope.  And when you get it, it doesn't just keep you alive, it's also refreshing, cleansing, cooling, and purifying.

Water changes everything.  God, His presence, changes everything.  Where it was once dry and hopeless, there is life, refreshment and hope.  Where I was once parched and filthy, I can be filled with life and clean.  Ah, I want to drink deeply of the living water that is my Jesus!

My Secret Heart

Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; 

all your waves and breakers have swept over me.  

Psalm 42:7 NIV

Deep within my secret heart

Where vision finds its life,

Deeper yet than all my doubts,

Where dreams give birth to hope renewed,

Where the searing edge of fear is quenched,

Beyond the shouts of enemies,

To the place where life emerges free, unhindered,

Bubbling from wellsprings deeper still,

Roaring from waterfalls of Heaven,

Where no one else may ever see,

There, and only there, is truly me,

Kneeling in the throne room of my King,

His waves and breakers cleansing me.

Thriving in Hardship - A Lesson from Carnival Fish

Hi Friends,

So the kids went to their school's carnival on Sunday and sure enough, Jayna came home with a bag full of those little carnival goldfish that you win by throwing a ping pong ball in the little fish bowl.  Oh joy.

But that got me thinking about the first time we brought home carnival fish … and I expected them to die.  I learned something then that I needed to remember today.  Maybe you do too.

Back then, it happened like this:

They were supposed to die.  I had planned on it, counted on it, prepared my five-year-old daughter for the inevitable.  From the moment Bethany won those two tiny goldfish at the carnival, I fully expected to be flushing them away a few days later. 

            I lifted the clear plastic bag and stared at the fish.  One bumped against the side. 

Bethany danced around me.  “Yay, yay, yay, one for me and one for Joelle!”  She tugged on my pantleg.  “Do we have a bowl for them?  Do we have food?  What are we going to name them?  Will they get bigger?  Are they girls?  I’m going name one Dorothy.”  She grinned and clapped her hands.

I lowered the bag. The water sloshed inside it causing the fish to dip and spin.  I brushed my hand over Bethany’s hair.  “We have everything we need, Sweetie, but you know fish like this don’t live that long.”

“How come?”
            “I don’t know.  They just don’t.”  I’d gotten fish like this many times before, some as carnival prizes, some with “three free goldfish” coupons from our local pet store.  They never lived past the first week.

Bethany sighed.  “Well, all right.  But can we keep them anyway?”

“Of course.”  I put my arm around her and smiled.

When we got home that evening, I carefully put the fish into a bowl of treated water and crumbed some fish food flakes on top.

Bethany pressed her nose against the outside of the bowl and watched with big eyes.  “Maybe they won’t die right away.”

I patted her arm.  “Bedtime now.  Go get ready.” Then, I glanced back at the fish as Bethany scampered upstairs.  I shook my head.  They’ll probably be belly-up by morning. 

But they weren’t.

The next morning they were swimming around their bowl and glowing with health. 

“Look, Mom, they’re still alive!”

Give them a few days.  I stifled the words and turned away.

A few days came and went.  The fish still lived.  I gave them until the weekend.  They were still alive on Monday.  I cleaned the bowl, treated new water, and waited.

Another week, another bowl cleaning, another and another.  And still the fish lived.

One day I even dropped one of them into the sink as I was cleaning the bowl.  I grabbed it up and threw it back into the water.  It’ll die for sure now.  But it didn’t.  In fact, it’s been almost a year, and those tiny fish aren’t so tiny anymore (Note: those fish lived for YEARS … one even for over 5 years and grew huge!).

Recently, I looked at them and wondered aloud, “Why have these fish lived when all my previous goldfish died so quickly?”  After all, I treated their water too, and fed them the same food, and cleaned the bowl just the same as with these fish.

My husband, Bryan, answered from the other room, “It’s the water out here.  It’s got to be.”

“Water?  What do you mean?”

“All those other fish we had at our old house.  Now we’re on well water.  We had it tested.  Remember?  It’s pure, a lot purer anyway than that city water we used to get.”

The water - what they were surrounded in, what they lived in and breathed every day.  Of course.

The next week, I was reading Philippians when I came to chapter four, verse eight (NIV).  It said, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-- think about such things.”  And as I thought about the idea of purity and excellence, I remembered Bethany’s not-so-little fish.  They were weak, and small, and destined to die quickly.  But they lived because of the purity of the water, even after the hardship of dropping one in the sink. 

People, maybe, aren’t much different.  How well we survive, how well we thrive, may have everything to do with what we let our thoughts soak in, what we live and breathe every day.  Do I let my mind swim around in polluted water? Or do I clean the bowl and put in pure water as often as I can? 

After all, even the weak survive when the water’s pure. 

Silence!

Hi Friends,

I find myself longing for moments of silence, of quiet solitude, this past week.  My soul is hungry for it … that time with God beyond the rush, the to-do's, the needs of everyone and everything around me.  My soul is hungry.  Starving even.

But the girls need to be picked up from school in 15 minutes.  They need help with their homework.  Jayden needs to be picked up too.  And the horses cared for (Jewel is still sorta gimpy).  Papers need to be filled out, the house picked up (sometimes it feels like I mean that literally!), family fed, graduations attended, mail sorted … and here I am, longing for silence, for God, for a breath amidst it all.

Ruth Haley Barton says, "The process of establishing a way of life that is rich and responsive to the needs of body and soul is led by leaders who are willing to face their own human situation, to …  work form what's real rather than what they wish was real. "  She also says, "It is not up in the heavens or across the ocean.  It is right here - in this body, in this soul, in this set of circumstances.  This is where you will discover the will of God."  And to discover it, we need those moments of silence, of solitude, of being quiet before God.  That is the rhythm I'm longing for today.  Are you longing too?

What if we just did it?  What if we found our silent time however we could find it?  What if we grabbed it like the precious gem, the precious gift that it is.  What if we did not hesitate, delay, press on … what if NOW was the moment?

I dare you.  I dare me …

SILENCE

Silently, so silently,

In the silence of night,

I hear the call to silence

As busyness takes flight.

Listen to the silent voice

That beckons in my soul,

Calling me to quietness

So God can make me whole.

When Someone Loses a Loved One

Hi Friends,

I got a call late Sunday night from my friend, Pam.  "Marlo, it's Whammy," she said through sobs.  "I lost my husband tonight."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing (in fact, I still can barely believe it), but it was true.  Pam's husband, Rachel and Sam's dad, our friend, died in a quad accident Sunday night.

We're going to miss him -- his big smile, his generous heart, his laugh and the way he was always glad to see you.

He was a good man, a kind man.  Our lives will be less rich now that he's gone.  His family's will be too.  Our hearts ache for his wife, his son, and his daughter (who is good friend of our girls').

So, as I think about Dave, his family, and the upcoming funeral that we'll be officiating at (1:00pm this Friday at SVCC, with reception to follow at the Golf & Country Club across the street), I think about how Jesus understands what this family is going through. I think about Rachel and Sam and how Jesus, too, lost an earthly father in Joseph.  Jesus knew what it was to grieve for a father who had died.  Jesus knows now too.  He knows how to comfort those who are grieving.  He knows what it means, and He is there, so near to the broken-hearted.

I want to know how to offer comfort too.  I want to be near, like Jesus.

And so, here are some tidbits of advice for comforting those who have lost someone they love:

DO:

--   Say simply, “I’m so sorry.”  At this time, you can give the person a hug, squeeze his/her hand reassuringly, or place your hand gently on his/her shoulder.  Small physical demonstrations such as these can be a soothing balm to the person’s emotions.

--   Say, “I’ll be supporting you with my prayers during this tough time.” Then pray!

--   Also pray for God’s help, sensitivity, and guidance in all your interactions with the grieving person.  Remember that the Holy Spirit himself is our Comforter.

--   If you knew the deceased, share something (briefly) that you appreciated about him/her.  A simple “I’ll never forget how Charlie helped me when  . . .” can be a great comfort.

--   Ask if you can help by bringing over a meal, looking after small children for a few hours, or making any necessary phone calls.  If they must leave town for the funeral, ask if they need a ride to the airport, or if you can look after their pets or water their plants while they’re away.

--   Offer a sympathetic ear a few days after the funeral/memorial service is over.  Often people will feel like talking about the service and their memories of the deceased after their initial grief has subsided.  Taking the person out to a one-on-one lunch can provide the perfect opportunity.

DON’T:

--   Don’t ask if the deceased was a Christian.  What will you say if the answer is no?

--   Don’t give advice.  Let people grieve in their own way.

--   Don’t talk about your own grief (i.e. when your Aunt Edith died, or when your cousin was in an accident, or especially when you lost a beloved pet). This will only make the other person feel awkward, as if they have to comfort you, instead of the other way around!

--   Don’t trivialize others’ grief with comments such as “You should be happy that Charlie’s gone on to heaven,” or “At least Claire lived a full life,” or “Maybe it’s better this way.”

--   Don’t put on a happy face.  As Proverbs 25:20 (RSVP) says, “He who sings songs to a heavy heart is like one who takes off a garment on a cold day, and like vinegar on a wound.”

Now, as I seek to offer comfort to those who are grieving, I try to keep these guidelines in mind, remembering the counsel of Proverbs 12:18 (NIV):  “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

Ten Tips for Taming a Hair-Raising Week

Hi Friends,

Well, this is the kind of week it's been (see picture of Bria -- ha ha, yes it's for real!).  It's been a little crazy, a little wild, a little wide-eyed and scary.  But a lot of wind of the Spirit too.

So here are ten tips I've used this week for my "hairy" times:

1) Take a moment to breathe.  Really breathe. Take another moment.

2) Let God arrange and maintain my schedule, and trust Him to do it right.

3) Take a walk alongside the beach on the busiest day of all.  Feel the sun and ocean breeze.  Breathe again.

4) Laugh more, stress less … even if it's really not that funny.

5) Ponder an odd scripture verse (For me this week: Grain must be ground to make bread; so one does not go on threshing it forever. --Isaiah 28:28)

6) Eat your favorite food (i.e., Maui Zaui pizza from Round Table).

7) Ask for help.  Keep asking until you get some.

8) Engage fully in what you're doing at the moment and don't worry about the other 19 things on your to-do list for the day … at least not right now.

9) Find a picture that makes you giggle (see photo above).

10) Be kind to others, especially the most annoying ones.

And those are ten tips to help tame a hair-raising week!

The Fine Art of Waiting

Hi Friends,

Today I'm doing the final proof-reading of my upcoming book, Wrestling with Wonder.  I am on the chapter where Mary sees her son turn water into wine, and she sees so much more.

For those who are in the "waiting place" of life, this chapter is for you.  Here is the introduction to the chapter … to give you something to ponder, and to encourage you!

The Fine Art of Waiting

What does wonder look like in the land of waiting? What if you go months, years, decades, believing in God’s power and promises, but not seeing that power revealed in your circumstances? Mary has been there, in the waiting place. She believed the angel’s words in Luke 1, she sang of what God would do in her Magnificat, but now decades have passed. Jesus has not stepped forward in power, has not revealed his majesty, has not conquered Rome. Then, tucked away at a wedding in Galilee, she hears those words again: “My hour has not yet come.”

            Yet, a transformation is about to take place. Not only of water into wine, but of Mary herself. From mother to follower. From parent to disciple.

            So, as we wrestle with a God who asks us to wait, God is beckoning us to come to a wedding at Cana. As we struggle to understand a God who sometimes does not come through with the power we are looking for in the timeline we want, he is inviting us to come alongside Mary. As we question a God who sees the need and still says “not yet,” he calls us to watch Mary touching the sleeve of her son. To hear her words: “They have no wine.”

            Let us wait with her. Because transformation will come. Of water. Of stone jars. Of need. Of worry. Of the waiting itself. Because we too will be transformed.