Welcome to the blog of author Marlo Schalesky!

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Being You - A Lesson from Tea-Time

Hi Friends,

I'll be attending a fancy tea this coming Sunday as a fundraiser for the local Confidence Pregnancy Center, so I've been thinking about what a not-fancy-tea person I am … and figuring that God's okay with that, and I can enjoy the tea party anyway.

And I was reminded of this story from a few years ago, when God showed me the importance of just being me. I hope you find this encouraging too - whether you're the fancy-tea type or not!


It wasn’t the knife.  Or the bread.  Or the cucumber, or cream cheese.  It was me.  I knew it.  But I wasn’t ready to admit it.  At least not yet.   I can do this, I told myself.  I can be the fancy-tea-party hostess, just like Debbie!
I took a deep breath, placed the knife ever so carefully over the cucumber sandwich, and pushed.  Surely this time I would make a perfect, neat triangle.  But alas, my cut was crooked, a cucumber slipped out, and a bubble of cream cheese oozed over the side of the squashed-looking bread. 
The knife clattered into the sink.  Who was I kidding, thinking I could host a fancy tea party for the church?  To me, a sandwich was either peanut butter and jelly slapped between two pieces of bread, or a fat subway picked up from the local deli counter.  I’d never even seen a cucumber sandwich until I’d been to one of Debbie’s elegant tea parties a few months before.  So, how could I possibly turn myself into a Debbie-like hostess in just a few short hours?
My husband, Bryan, walked through the kitchen door just as I retrieved the knife from the sink.  He looked from me to the stack of coin-sized cucumbers beside me.  “What in the world are you doing?” 
I straightened my shoulders.  “Making sandwiches for the high tea I’m putting on this afternoon.”
“High tea?”  His eyebrows rose.  “You?”
I pointed my knife at him.  “Don’t you dare laugh!”
He made an admirable attempt, but in the end the laugh came out anyway.  “You’re kidding, right?”
“Does it look like I’m kidding?”
His gaze wandered over the pile of misshapen sandwich wedges.  “Are they supposed to look like that?”
I picked up a baking pan and aimed.
Wisely, Bryan quick-stepped out of the room.  I could still hear him chuckling as he opened the front door and headed toward the garage.
            I tried one more sandwich – and failed – before I, too, escaped outside.  There, a blanket of purple, red, and orange wildflowers bloomed over our property.  And mixed among the colors were graceful yellow flowers that looked like daffodils.  They would be perfect for a centerpiece bouquet for my tea party.  I trotted down the steps and began to pick a few of the long-stemmed flowers.  As I did, I noticed several dandelions scattered among the other blossoms.  I picked one and twirled it in my fingers.  It was yellow like the daffodil, but as far removed in elegance as I was from Debbie. 
And yet, as my fingers brushed the soft face, I saw that there was a beauty in the dandelion too.  God created it the way it was.  And if you turned it just right, it reflected the sun’s rays. 
I tucked the blossom into a buttonhole on my shirt and gazed out over the field scattered with flowers.  Each, I noticed, was just as God made it to be.  The purple flowers didn’t pretend to be orange.  The red didn’t masquerade as purple.  And the dandelions certainly didn’t try to impersonate daffodils. 
In that moment, Ephesians 4:11-12 (NIV) came to mind:  “It was [God] who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers . . . so that the body of Christ may be built up.”  It was then that I finally admitted that I’d never turn into a daffodil.  So, perhaps, I should just try to be the best dandelion I could be.  Maybe the important thing was that I, too, reflect the light of the Son who gave me life. 

            I gathered a few more flowers then returned to the house.  There, I arranged the blossoms in a vase, and, just for fun, tucked my dandelion inconspicuously into the center.  Debbie, of course, would never have a dandelion in her daffodils.  But I wasn’t Debbie.  And I didn’t need to be.  I just needed to be faithful to God and to the person he made me to be.  With a final look at my little dandelion, I headed out to the deli to pick up some less-than-fancy sandwiches for my not-so-high tea.


Kiersti said...

This is beautiful, Marlo! Your writing seems to never fail to touch me. Thanks for the reminder that it's okay to be who God made us to be!

Marlo Schalesky said...

Thanks, Kiersti!